Ha, what a week. Two wins, two losses, a huge snowstorm and quite possibly the end of two eras…Let’s get right to it…
In last place, the Jets. The Jets suck so hard they might give you a hickey just by watching them. I mean really, getting embarrassed by a Trevor Semen led team? That’s just sad. So let’s talk about what happened, the Jets’ bonafide stud Robbie Anderson seems to have flown too close to the sun and came crashing back to earth, while Jets’ QBs Josh McCown (more on him later) and Bryce Petty combined to complete 8 passes for a magical 60 yards. And the defense, boy were they offensive. It’s not that they gave up a whole mess of yards, more that they gave up any to that shit bag offense. Now to McCown, Old Man Winter broke his hand on Sunday, ending his season and you’d think his career (unless of course the Jets want to give him a 3 year, $60MM extension…). Sad times, but for leading this team to 5 wins, they may very well erect a statue out front of the Swamps.
In second to last place, the Pats. We have seen the end of a second era (The Josh McCown era being the first) on Monday night, as Tom Brady appears to have fallen off the cliff. (Meanwhile, all Jimmy G does is win and now holds a record 1.000 winning percentage). The Pats showed up in South Beach for a nice little vacation, clearly they were not there to play football. Brandon Cooks showed off his elite alligator arm skills as he was humiliated by a defensive back from Baylor (a team that regularly gave up 50 or 60+ points during his tenure). The running backs were OK, but of course BB still refuses to give the ball to the black guy, so therefore the team went from 1st and goal on the half yard line, to 3rd and goal from the 11. Nate Soldier still sucks, Marcus Cannon always sucked and Shaq Mason comes from a program that has yet to adopt the forward pass. Yeah, that bodes well for a deep playoff run. Pack it in and play for a draft pick at this point.
On to the winners.
In second place, the Miami Dolphins. It’s nice to know that they have that kind of performance in them, too bad they don’t have a coach that is capable of getting the team to play to it’s potential week in and week out. But when they are good, boy are they good. Smokin’ Jay looked like a young buck fresh from Vanderbilt (the fact that Jay Cutler was allowed on the campus of Vandy makes anyone’s argument that “X player went to X school so he must be smart,” completely invalid). Suh wants to kill Brady and Cameron (they said his real name on the broadcast) Wake has been very good, for a very long time. Oh yeah, and that Kenyn Drake kid seems to be OK at footballing. Kind of makes you question Mr. Gase’s talent evaluation skills if he was #3 on the depth chart all year…Oh well, the Fins won a game and hurt their draft stock. Go AFC East!!
And now for the big winner of the week, the Buffalo Bills (If you can spot them through the driving snow). Now that was a game that everyone loves. Lots of weather condition, a little bit of mayhem on the field because of it. And the Bills have now never lost a game to Jacoby Brissett. Oh yeah, we may have seen the end of a third era this week, after going down with a concussion and allowing Joe Webb III to win the game for the team, the Nathan Peterman era could very well be over in Orchard Park. AH well, it was a fun ride while it lasted. What with the weather and all this was a game for the running backs and Shady went out there to do Shady things. You guys may hate Rex and Dougie Fresh, but at least they got you a truly bonafide Stud for the low, low price of a shitty human being and overrated LB. The Bills are on track to make the playoffs, Xmas eve in Foxboro is going to be interesting.