Well, I guess we can call this out first undefeated week of the season…It was ugly all around, but that just seems fitting for the 2020 AFC East. So yeah, we’re gonna say everyone won, but it kind of felt like everyone lost. Let’s do it.
We’ll start the three way tie for last place with the Dolphins. The Fins’ once promising season has really gone off the rails. Just two short weeks ago, America was talking about Tua as the Hawaiian Steve Young, who would lead the Fins to heights not seen since the advent of the facemask. Now, Tua has been benched and Fitz got the start. It was as ugly as you’d expect. The Fins won the game, but more due to the complete incompetence of their opponent rather than their own footballing prowess. I suppose the defense played well, which is a happy chance for Dolphins fans who have had to endure the product their favorite team has produced in recent years. But once again, I’m not real sure they were good, or they were playing an opponent who clearly has no interest in showing up for work this season. Oh well, a win is a win and the Fins still have a chance to win the division.
Next up in the tie for last is the Bills. I mean the analysis of this game is more or less a copy/paste of the Dolphins analysis. The Bills welcomed a horrible Chargers team to Orchard Park for a 1pm game. They are fortunate that the league has no interest in putting the Bills in timeslots where viewers are available because had the Chargers been allowed to shake their jet lag, they may well have won this game. Although it’s more than likely that Anthony Lynn would have found some spectacular way to screw up the final minutes to ensure a Bills’ victory. You know things are bad when I haven’t seen even one tweet from a DBF about how Josh Allen’s starts from the game are clearly telling you that he’s going to win at least as many championships as Joe Montana. I suppose that’s hard when the best highlight he had all day was a TD pass where his receiver (Knox) was essentially standing alone, yet had to essentially dive backwards to catch the short toss from Allen…But hey, Bills fans did get to see a decent TD throw from a Bills player when Beasley threw one. So at least you have that to fall back on…
And the last of the losers is the Pats. Once again, the Pats did in fact win their contest, but it sure was ugly and they no doubt also benefitted from a West Coast team coming east for a 1pm game. Cam Newton finished the game with 9 completions for 94 yards and 2 interceptions. This resulted in a QB rating of 23.6, the lowest rating by a winning QB in an NFL game since the great Mark Sanchez in 2012. I mean the Pats had no business winning this game, if not for Kliff Kyle Kingsbury doing what young coaches normally do and pooping his pants when facing Bill Belichick, the Cards would have won this game going away. I’m searching for something positive to say about the Pats here, but I’m at a loss. Also, Kylar Murray is not as good as advertised.
And well give first place to the Jets this week. Their magic number for the #1 overall pick is down to just 4 (I think, not sure what the tie breakers look like with the Jags) and then we’ll get to see the disappointment unfold all over again. But for now, everything is sunshine and buttercups in the garbage pile otherwise known as New Jersey. The Jets are surely going to pick the right head coach this time around and they’ll no doubt get a sure fire hall of famer with the #1 pick. You know, until Joey Lawrence decides to go back to school for one last real college season (I mean who want your last year of college to be the covid year?) and they decide to “get tougher” and bring in Matt Patricia to coach the team. Well that’s the future now, the Jets endured a tough challenge in the Fins who tired their darndest to lose that game. But the Jets showed a determination that we haven’t seen out them since Al Groh prowled the sidelines in New Brunswick. Way to go Jets.