Welcome to week 4 of the 2019 NFL season. We were lucky and the Jets had a bye, so we didn’t have to subject our eyes to their terrible brand of football, so at least there is that…And we had a big interdivisional matchup of undefeated teams…So, here we go.
In last place, the Dolphins. Of course. They may be losing the tank off to some sneaky contenders, but they will always be the worst in our eyes (well, at least long as the Jets aren’t playing). The Fins took on the Chargers this week. The Chargers haven’t won a game in Miami since like 1969, but not amount on cross country travel and jet lag, will deter the Dolphins from continuing to lose on purpose. I mean I don’t know why we continue to go through this charade each week, just let the Dolphins forfeit every game from here on out, then give them the #3 pick, just because. No, I’m not going to comment on the game, if they don’t want to try, neither do I.
In second to las place, the Jets. I know, I usually give the team on the bye a pass, but these are the Jets and STDs spleen is larger than ever. So, I leave them with the trash, where they belong.
Next loser, the Bills. The Bills suffered their first defeat of the season this week, when they welcomed the Patriots to Orchard Park. The Bills defense gave it their all, stymieing Brad and the Pats offense for most of the game. But Josh Allen is the Bills’ quarterback and he is just plain terrible. I’ve heard from Bills fans that he is improved over last season. If that’s the case, and he continues his current progression trend, he’ll be average by 2045. The Bills did have one excellent drive that ended in the first touchdown allowed by the Patriots’ defense since January (but even on that drive, where Allen went 6/6 passing, he tried his best to cough it up on the goal line.) They also battled into scoring position a couple other times, only to have Allen either throw a terrible interception, or drop back a mile and get sacked out of FG range. But yeah, the Bills need to keep giving him a chance for at least another year or two. Lucky for the Bills, Allen ran himself into a concussion in the 4th quarter and on the following play, Matt Barkley dropped a dime to John Brown, setting the Bills up inside the 5, to take the lead. Four plays later, the Bills’ defense was back on the field. So sad. Bills’ coach Sean McD then caused quite a stir in his postgame presser, declaring that he thought James Jones should have been thrown out of the game for what was really a fairly run of the mill high hit. And now Bills fans seem to not remember any sort of football history and think that guys get tossed from games all the time for personal fouls. It’s really kind of embarrassing to see people who I thought were rational football fans act like this. But hey, continued losing for decades will do that to a fanbase. JOSH ALLEN IS THE REASON THE BILLS LOST THIS GAME. ADMIT IT.
And now the only winner of the week.
Of course, it’s the Patriots. The Pats’ defense played pretty well, but their performance is being overrated by most people. They gave up a touchdown to Josh Allen, that is a loss in itself. But they did at least catch the passes that he threw to them, not really needing to cover anyone, as the ball was rarely close to a receiver. The front seven did play well again. Making Josh Allen try and sound out the looks they were giving him was kind of funny. I can’t wait for this defense to play a representative NFL offense, then we can see how good they really are. The Pats’ offense was downright terrible. Scoring only one touchdown, early in the game. They did drive down inside the Bills 10, with a chance to really blow the game open, but Tom Brady was in a bitchy mood, so he threw a terrible interception that looks like something off the arm of Josh Allen. Lastly, Stephen Gostkowski still sucks. He’s going to lose this team a game very soon. It should have been Sunday, but you know, Josh Allen…